Muted and why

Don't feel like ringing your bell,
I don't think you'll open the door
Don't feel like looking back,
I don't think you stand there anymore.
I don't look for a friend,
I don't care about the foe's
I don't need your affection..
neither do i need your dough..
Some say I've become a loner,
Most say I'm insane,
I say keep the pity to yourself..
and really .. not again!!
I'm beyond the shams
and I'm behind closed doors
Don't try to pull me out,
The wound has become just a little sore.
My dreams are stained by false promises,
and I walk a carpet of broken hopes,
but I guess.. that's alright..
I'm just a little too used to the imperfections..
and just a little too used to this life
without you .. and without my-self..